Marriage Killer?

I was trawling the WSJ online during one of my never-ending breast feeding sessions and a small link to an article entitled ‘Marriage Killer’ caught my eye.

It was a very hilarious yet very serious problem in many marriages. Yes, Nagging. It even goes to say…Nagging is far more common than adultery (really?!) but is as toxic.

So it was said, in credit to the writer (I did not take notice of the author’s gender) he/she mentioned that BOTH men and women NAG but due to women being able to more easily pick up a ‘problem’ – e.g. trash not taken out, tv not fixed etc, they tend to nag more.

Well to me, a nagging MAN is very much worse than a nagging woman. Have you been nagged by a man before? “shudder”

So the article goes to say that the Naggee (person being nagged) and the Nagger (person nagging) is caught in a vicious cycle. The nagger will continue to nag because they feel that the naggee is ignoring them (and the Naggee is indeed ignoring them after the repetitive nagging). So the man Does have the capacity to ZONE out…(here being very biased and assuming the Man is being nagged).

Lets face it, feminism aside, that a woman usually has lower tolerance levels to unwashed dishes, a leaky tap or unthrown thrash. And the man MAY say…”I’ll do it later…its not a matter of life and death, is it?”

The article continues to warn us that the couple could be soon arguing about the FACT that one party nags and their arguments begin to stem around the fighting and not the cause of the fight, in the first place.

So, an apparent solution? The soft approach. And perhaps usage of endearments and/or humour while saying it. Perhaps we can take example from a lady quoted in the article, saying she wrote a note to her husband. “I really need your help,” a recent plea began. “I am really backed up and in a lot of discomfort.” It was signed “your faithful bathtub drain.”

I should really try that on my hubby. I, only married for 2 years am starting to feel the nag effect. I try to ignore it the first few times the ‘offence’ is committed. Finally when you cant stand it no more and the naggee still does it, you either do it yourself or just start simmering and then boiling under the surface of your skin ((you know that feeling, dont you). Heck, you dont have to even be married to experience that. If could even start of in a good, long relationship with your boyfriend.

In my own words, when you feel the need to nag. Go do online shopping with your hubby’s credit card instead!!


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